Signs you are in an abusive relationship/ marriage

1. You are used to satisfying your spouse’s sexual needs when you don’t feel like it. You are forced to have sex.

2. Your opinion does not matter. Your spouse dominates all decision making processes.

3. Your spouse orders you to do what he/she wants instead of requesting you with respect.

4. Your body is insulted and made fun of by your spouse but you still have to give him/her sex.

5. Your spouse gangs up with his/her friends/parents to mock you and show you how good for nothing you are.

6. You are called names designed to hurt you.

7. Your spouse joins the people of the opposite gender he/she is flirting and fooling around with to make you feel worthless.

8. Your being with your spouse has made you believe in yourself less and damaged your self esteem.

9. You are not allowed to pursue your goals and dreams in marriage.

10. Each time you try to speak up, you are silenced, told you are not educated enough or told because of your gender you have no say on the matter.

11. You work hard in your family business but all the money goes to your spouse who determines what the money will be used for as you are denied access to the money.

Pic courtesy of Ebony Malika (laneslense)

12. You are inflicted physical pain through armtwisting, pulling of hair violently, slapping, blows, throwing of hard and fragile objects to you to harm you.

13. When you complain about the pain, you are told you brought it upon yourself.

14. When you cry, your tears go ignored by the one person who should care for you.

15. You have to beg your spouse for assistance especially money, not because your spouse doesn’t have money, but because your spouse wants to show you that you are nothing without him/her.

16. Your spouse abandons you in the middle of the road and drives off to “teach you a lesson”.

17. You are denied the opportunity to worship the God you love and your personal spiritual growth denied.

18. You are ridiculed about how you raise the children, you are left alone to parent the children and then shouted at when the children do wrong

19. The secrets you shared with your spouse are used against you to attack you.

20. You are belittled by your spouse because of the job you do, the family you grew up in, your economical background, your formal educational level.

21. Phone calls and text messages from your spouse leave you with fear, lowering your moods.

21. You are cut off from your friends and family by your spouse because your spouse doesn’t want you telling others he/she mistreats you. Your spouse is imprisoning you.

22. You are shown signs of contempt such as pointing of finger, being pushed over, deliberare offenses and public shaming.

23. You are constantly being told how you are worthless and can never do anything right.

24. The presence of your spouse scares you and makes you cringe and become uneasy.

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