Losing your friend to love

Relationships bring happiness and joy to the couple, a blissful moment that the world could never understand. Sometimes the two lovebirds can get engrossed in their newfound love till they forget whoever else is around them. This can be friends, family or even siblings. Have you ever found a situation that you feel left out when your friend suddenly falls in love and all their time is spent with the loved one? Then the sun stops shining and the stars are just tiny little sparks in the sky-FOR YOU THAT IS.

Well, it is quite natural for a couple to sometimes neglect their previous ‘priorities’ that made them fun and easy to be around with. As the girls, Friday nights out were the in-things, partying hard and downing those tequila shots like nobody’s business. For the boys, it was Sunday afternoon football and random night outs with sexy ladies. But all that is gone and all you are left with is this individual who is always texting or is constantly on the phone when you go out, always speaking about their better half when it’s unnecessary, or they are trying to convince you to get a spouse yourself. And you’re like ‘what happened to this person who I once knew so well?’I’d like to inform you that this is hardly being selfish.

Sometimes it’s hard to explain what happens when one ideally ‘falls in love’. It is obviously a new experience to someone and you can’t blame him or her for wanting to experience it. So they go full out and give it their all, and you are left out wondering where the heck you fit in this puzzle. Some people will take this really bad and will end up ruining solid relationships. Instead of fully supporting the couple, every chance they get they will pull them apart, maybe by bad mouthing their boy or girlfriend, forcing them to go on night outs meant for single people and which usually end up in disaster. Again this is perfectly normal but very wrong at the same time.

I always say that you never know how it feels being in love until you’re in love. So at times it’s good to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. Here they are, having spent most of their precious time with you, and when they want to share it with someone else; you go ahead and pull the jealous card. It’s pretty unfair if you think of it. So instead of doing that, you can try coming up with a ‘timetable’ with them, ridiculous as this may sound, it actually works. Just come up with a day that you exclusively spend with them, no chats, no love texts, just you and your pal. This might be a collection of fun activities that help you re-live the good ol’ days as well as bond. Be a good listener as well, and act as a stress reliever because relationships do take a toll on a person and they need to know that a friend is there for them if they need to vent. If they understand about the situation, then there is nothing to worry about.

Problems normally brew when they think that you are out to destroy their relationship. Love can make one pretty desperate and you have to be ready for this. When they react negatively, please don’t take it the wrong way. It’s sort of like a defense mechanism. They might not want to spend time with you, preferring instead to spend it with their loved one’s…no hard feelings. Just give them some time to settle down. This might seem impossible to bear but you will have to do it because you will be the only one ‘clear-headed’ at that time and of course you will be pushed by a platonic love for your friend. With time, you will see that everything will be easier to handle and things will work out well.

If they don’t, then they’ll see how they’ve been a royal pain in the neck when it will be your turn to finally fall in love, and it will be the moment they will need you the most. Of course, it will also be your moment to decide whether to be ‘emotionally unavailable or not. ’Let’s just say karma is a bad b*tch.

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Twitter : @TheDragnet

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