Three things to know about making friends - The Sauce Three things to know about making friends - The Sauce
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Three things to know about making friends

As an adult, it could be hard to understand that someone is having a hard time making friends, and not just friends but the connection with people.

The bond that allows you to engage and find that thing that makes you enjoy having people around and in your space and time.

What makes it worse is that making these connections is necessary because as an adult, you constantly are in transition. From finishing school to moving towns, switching jobs, and even just outgrowing people, friendships are always morphing where some unfortunately many end.


Consequently, you are left feeling like you are back to day one in school where you have to bear the vulnerability and put yourself out there for a chance to make those yearned connections. Connections are so essential because they then give you a beautiful sense of belonging.

Question is what then does it mean for those who have a hard time making these necessary relationships? Is our fate doomed to the constant fear of putting yourself out there and thinking that you ultimately are the problem? That you are not fun enough or that you are even toxic? Or that you are too selective which is making you miserable? Nope, that’s not it for sure. Here’s why

Connections Take Time

They really do, especially with age because you now are aware of what you can have and what you definitely cannot tolerate. And with experiences that have shaped you and your view of life, the slightest of things can become a turn-off where you can almost instantly tell whose energy is off. So yes, you hang in there, when the right connection comes, it will kick in like the Wi-Fi connection in your home; easy and effortless.

It’s Not You, It’s probably them!

Yes, yes yes, you are not the problem. You are probably in an environment with people who are not necessarily your tribe. This cuts across such a wide spectrum of things from values to backgrounds to personalities and interests. So yes, if you are having a tough time connecting, it just means that there are things about you two that are just not clicking which is not a bad thing at all. And that does not make you a bad person, it makes you human. So hang in there until you find people or a person that you share something in common with.

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Give Space for vulnerability

With all said and done, the bottom line is that you need to give it a chance because sometimes, we hide the cause of fear. Fear of being judge, fear that we are not good enough or fear of being hurt or hurt again. But knowing how essential these connections are and how they elevate the life experience. How? We these are the people with who you share moments, moments which ultimately make life worth living. I know sounds deep but they really do. So give yourself a chance and let yourself make bonds.


It can be really hard to find your vibe and tribe however that should not deter you from putting in the effort.

Life is beautiful and what makes it worth living is the people in it.

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