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5 things you can do when you get sexiled


Sexiles are common in campus hotels and in student residential areas. No one likes being sexiled. Some say exiles, but there’s actually a difference between sexiles and exiles. In exiles, there is no guarantee that sex will take place. The guy who has exiled you might spend the whole time negotiating and still have his offer turned down. In exiles, you can be guaranteed returning to your room sooner than expected. Your friend might call you at 11 at night to tell you that you are free to go back since their visitor has already left.  In exiles there might be an agreement between roommates. There’s usually prior notice.

On the other hand, sexiles are sudden and without notice. Experts and super players are the ones who sexile their roomies. You might be preparing to get into a bed after a days’ fatigue when all of a sudden your casanova roommate shows up with a pretty lady and tells you to bounce. He might not even need to tell, you will get the hint from the look he gives you. When you have been sexiled, you have no guarantee of how soon you will return to your room.  All you do is hope and pray. Guys who sexile their roommates always have plenty of women and to make matters worse, these women always want to stay for long periods of time. Now, here are five things you can do when you are sexiled.


  1.   Complain and cause chaos

Sometimes, a man feels he has had enough. If you feel that you are really being disrespected, it might just be time to plant some resistance.  ‘Mwanaume ni kuzusha.’ Trust me, the softer you are, there more exiles you will be subjected to.  You can just refuse to go anywhere.  In this case, pray that your roommate isn’t a badass. If they are, you might end up being a real time porn film director. You’ll be left standing there as they go ahead to do their thing. However, most of the time, complaining and causing chaos always works. You roommate will reconsider.


2.       Develop your game.

During the times that you are away, learn how to be a ladies magnate.  In life, always strive to have your own or else jealousy will kill you. You will end up being really jealous of your roommate and this might just destroy your friendship. It’s always a good thing to be the master, not the subject. Don’t be considerate. Today’s world is tough; it has no room for niceties.  Step your foot in the arena and learn how to be a man


3.       Plan an exit strategy

If you can’t take it anymore, it might just be time to start planning an exit strategy. If it’s a residential place and you are the owner, kick the other guy out. No one should rule you in your turf. If you are equally sharing the costs, leave and find a better place to stay. Also find better friends and better roommates. A true friend won’t exile you too often. You can also decide to rent a place alone, without sharing. This will give you freedom and peace of  mind.


4.       Go and study

If you don’t like studying, sexile time is the best time to study. Go to the library and bury yourself in books.  While your friend is busy building orgasms, stay busy building your future. Let the books be your pillows and the theories your blankets. Envision a future where you will be sleeping in a kingsize bed next to a beautiful trophy wife. You’ll have the money to sleep anywhere you want, including luxurious hotels. May the future drive you.


5.       Go home, go clubbing, crash at a friend’s place or play candy crash

I prefer to call this collection of choices, ‘the easy way out.’ This actions won’t solve anything in the long run but they will give you piece of mind at least for a short while. Most people prefer these options. Clubbing might make you spend what you hadn’t planned for.  Going home might make you look like a lazy student who doesn’t like staying in school to study.  Crashing at a friend’s place might also make the friend lose respect. If you have to crash somewhere, find a safe warm place and play candy crash the whole night.

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