I’m tired of the exiles - A note to my roommate - The Sauce
Connect with us

Hi, what are you looking for?

Da Squeeze

I’m tired of the exiles – A note to my roommate

sockonthedoor

Sheila was almost blacking out. She loved the way Ng’ash was spoiling her. According to her, he was the man. She moved over to hug him as he made another joke. It was around 12 midnight and Ng’ash decided it was time to go and have fun with her.They had been drinking at the Student’s Annex for three hours. He had chased her for a long time. Being a player, Sheila was the only girl who had eluded him for long, so he opted for dirty tricks. He took Sheila’s arm and walked her to his hostel room. Outside the door, he found a bag with a note on top. He picked it up and read it. The note read:

‘Vipi Ng’ash. Sincerely I’m tired of being exiled from my own room every time. I’m a bitter man. I won’t allow myself to be despised anymore, I may not be popular with the ladies like you are but I need some respect. Do you know how bad it feels like having to find a place to sleep five nights a week? Last night I had decided we should square it out like men. I just didn’t want to embarrass you before your lady.

Where do you get all those ladies? I thought Kevo was worse but I ‘m realizing that he is better. When I used to live with Kevo he always brought impromptu ladies. I used to sleep on the uppper decker of the bed while he preferred the ‘ground floor’ deck. He used to bring ladies to our room when I was asleep then start doing his thing. The funny thing is that he never even used to request me vacate the room. In my peaceful sleep I was always awakened by shaking of the bed and sexy voices shouting “Ivo Kevo …Ivo…Yes! Yes! Yes!”  I witnessed a lot of stuff. .

I can’t stand this anymore. Yesterday you came with a chips funga then you ate all my food. I had prepared that meal so well because I was planning to invite Kate over. Do you know how much you disadvantaged me?   Kate had agreed to come over then while I’m going to pick her, you call me and tell me that you are with a girl in the room and that I should find a place to sleep. I swear I was coming to break down that door. I just don’t know why I didn’t.

The other day Yvonne, a girl I’m really trying to impress came to visit me and all you could do was try to hit on her. You are a despicable, disrespecting fooll imbecile. Everything that you use is mine yet you have the guts to tell your ladies that you own everything in the room. You need serious thorough canes you………….7(&%^$%#@.

We have been friends a long time but I’m done with you. I’m the one who accepted your request to be my roommate. You remember when you didn’t have a place to stay and Kevo had decided to move to an apartment outside the school? You asked me whether you can come and stay in my room and I accepted. So right now I’m terminating this shameful contract. Goodbye. You will find your belongings outside the door when you arrive.”

Anto

Advertisement. Scroll to continue reading.
1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Mercyberyl

    May 3, 2013 at 9:23 am

    hahahahaha….can’t stop laughing. What a story. Creativity at it’s best. These things happen in campus

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Some More Sauce...

Entertainment

News of the arrest of popular disc jockey Joe Mfalme in connection with the fatal assault of a senior police officer has taken the...

Da Squeeze

Is there possibly one thing that Lisa Christoffersen cannot do? Seems unlikely. Having defied odds and beat stage 4 cancer 18 years ago, her...

Entertainment

Wizkid has requested people stop referring to him as an Afrobeats artist. The Nigerian singer – whose real name is Ayodeji Ibrahim Balogun –...

Da Squeeze

The devil works hard, but Brian Chira’s friends, acquaintances and fans work harder! Within hours of launching, the departed TikToker’s funeral fundraiser has amassed...

Entertainment

Shakira thinks she “probably” won’t find love like she had with Gerard Piqué again. The 47-year-old singer split from the former soccer star –...

Entertainment

Catherine, Princess of Wales has announced she is undergoing “preventative” chemotherapy for cancer. The 42-year-old royal – who is married to Prince William and...

Entertainment

One thing about Tyla’s monster 2023 release ‘Water,’ it is the hit that keeps on giving. The star may have already collected a Grammy...

Entertainment

Eminem is to release a new album this year, Dr. Dre has confirmed.  The 59-year-old music producer has revealed the 51-year-old rapper is to...