{"id":74759,"date":"2022-01-14T23:11:00","date_gmt":"2022-01-14T20:11:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/?p=74759"},"modified":"2022-01-17T08:59:47","modified_gmt":"2022-01-17T05:59:47","slug":"how-to-tell-if-you-are-the-toxic-one-in-the-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/2022\/01\/14\/how-to-tell-if-you-are-the-toxic-one-in-the-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Tell If You Are The Toxic One In The Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

We like throwing the word “toxic” aimlessly whenever someone in a relationship (intimate or otherwise) does something a bit off. Relationships fall apart all the time and if they didn\u2019t it would mean that we are admitting to being perfect beings through and through, which is just bizarre to even think about. While imperfection is perfectly normal, toxicity is not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Often, we like to blame our partners and other external factors for our relationships not working out because it is very hard to see the speck in our own eyes but very easy to see the logs in others’ eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It would take a huge amount of getting to know oneself inside out for you to be able to determine your role in the failing relationship. Self-awareness is what it is called. The conscious knowledge of one’s character and feelings. Self-awareness on both parties can be the key to a successful relationship but as it often happens, two people in a relationship will often be on different pages at different stages of their lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Knowing if you are the toxic one in the relationship can help your relationship greatly. That and indulging a therapist in your relationship of course.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

There are always tell-tale signs when a relationship begins to crumble.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can tell there\u2019s a problem in your relationship when:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*Most of the things your partner does makes you angry<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*You feel like your partner doesn\u2019t deserve you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*You always feel overwhelmed by your partner<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*You can never resolve arguments amicably<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*The relationship lacks intimacy (emotional, mental, and physical intimacy)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*You feel ignored and neglected by your partner<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*You cannot have a normal conversation without it turning into a quarrel<\/p>\n\n\n\n

*Your partner has no time for you and is never friendly towards you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is also very important to note that ALL of us have a role to play in our relationships. Whether we make the relationship successful or otherwise, the secret is in being self-aware which will make it very easy for you to listen to feedback and adjust accordingly without taking offense or being defensive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most people find it extremely hard to reach this level of self-awareness because it then means accepting that you are flawed. It takes courage to accept yourself flaws and all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A toxic partner can drain you emotionally (sometimes physically) and completely drain your mental health. But what if you are the villain in your relationship?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Toxicity can drain you emotionally and leave you with negative thoughts and as I said earlier, it\u2019s always easier to blame someone else for being toxic but we need to introspect too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, are you the toxic one?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

1.You are manipulative<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Manipulation can range from lying and hiding things from your partner, to gaslighting. If you are employing any of these manipulation tactics then you are toxic and this will likely interfere with your partner\u2019s love and respect for you in the long run.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. You\u2019re always threatening to walk out of the relationship<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Emotional blackmail is when you threaten your partner with a relationship. This is very unhealthy as these threats can make an already fragile situation worse. It may also lead to a trust deficit as your partner may cease to trust you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. You don\u2019t give your partner personal space<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Personal space is very important in a relationship no matter how long you have been in that relationship or how close you are with each other. Always give your partner their personal space as this leads to personal growth and the development of one\u2019s individual choices.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. You are too dominating<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

For a relationship to work, there have to be many compromises. But if you are in the habit of forcing things to go your way all the time and holding your partner hostage to your demands, it means your tactics are rather unhealthy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is important to listen to your partner and listen to their needs as well because they\u2019re an equal part of the relationship dynamic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. You never take responsibility<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

If you never take any responsibility for anything and instead only blame others for everything wrong under the sun, then you\u2019re being toxic. Playing the blame game only damages your relationship further by weighing heavily on your partner who may, in turn, resent you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. You make the relationship all about you and you lack empathy<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

If you are the type of person that believes that only your needs matter and don\u2019t give enough importance to what your partner is going through or what they need, then your relationship is unhealthy. If your partner has to find support from other people instead of coming to you for help and support, then rest assured that the relationship is lacking in a big way. If your partner feels in any way that they are ignored, neglected, and that they don\u2019t matter and they\u2019ve even voiced this out to you, then be sure that you are the toxic one.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We like throwing the word “toxic” aimlessly whenever someone in a relationship (intimate or otherwise) does something a bit off. Relationships fall apart all the time and if they didn\u2019t it would mean that we are admitting to being perfect beings through and through, which is just bizarre to even think about. While imperfection is perfectly normal, toxicity is not. Often, we like to blame… <\/p>\n

Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13083,"featured_media":74762,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6705,3],"tags":[3826,14624,14028,7901],"class_list":["post-74759","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-editors-pick","category-relationships","tag-toxic","tag-toxic-person","tag-toxic-relationships","tag-toxicity","is-cat-link-border-bottom"],"better_featured_image":{"id":74762,"alt_text":"","caption":"Shot of a couple having relationship problemshttp:\/\/195.154.178.81\/DATA\/shoots\/ic_784169.jpg","description":"","media_type":"image","media_details":{"width":612,"height":432,"file":"2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1.jpg","sizes":{"medium":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-300x212.jpg","width":300,"height":212,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-300x212.jpg"},"thumbnail":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-150x150.jpg","width":150,"height":150,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-150x150.jpg"},"theblogger_image_size_2":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-550x388.jpg","width":550,"height":388,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-550x388.jpg"},"theblogger_image_size_3":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-550x432.jpg","width":550,"height":432,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-550x432.jpg"},"theblogger_image_size_4":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-550x362.jpg","width":550,"height":362,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-550x362.jpg"},"theblogger_image_size_5":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-300x300.jpg","width":300,"height":300,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-300x300.jpg"},"tptn_thumbnail":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-250x250.jpg","width":250,"height":250,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-250x250.jpg"},"wp_rp_thumbnail":{"file":"istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-150x150.jpg","width":150,"height":150,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1-150x150.jpg"}},"image_meta":{"aperture":"0","credit":"Getty Images\/iStockphoto","camera":"","caption":"Shot of a couple having relationship problemshttp:\/\/195.154.178.81\/DATA\/shoots\/ic_784169.jpg","created_timestamp":"0","copyright":"PeopleImages","focal_length":"0","iso":"0","shutter_speed":"0","title":"","orientation":"0","keywords":[]}},"post":74759,"source_url":"https:\/\/www.capitalfm.co.ke\/lifestyle\/files\/2022\/01\/istockphoto-522183293-612x612-1.jpg"},"yoast_head":"\nHow To Tell If You Are The Toxic One In The Relationship - Capital Lifestyle<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"We like throwing the word "toxic" aimlessly whenever someone in a relationship (intimate or otherwise) does something a bit off. 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