Many men love to lay claim of them being the head of the home, but the head of the home is not a title but a function. Being the head of the home means…
1. Staying faithful to your one wife. How can you break the same home you claim you are the head of?
2. Promoting and maintaining teamwork with your wife. Many husbands destroy the spirit of teamwork by not involving their wives in decision making. Being head doesn’t mean you know everything or you make all decisions, but that you provide the right direction and environment where well-thought out decisions can be made.
3. Praying for your family, both with your wife and on your own. How can you be the head and not led by God?
4. Treating your wife properly because the wife dictates the mood of the house. If she is treated badly, the mood in the home becomes dull, cold, draining and unpleasant.
5. Coming up with a vision for the family in partnership with your wife. Where will you live ten years from now, which schools will the children go to? What growth will be attained as a family twenty years from now?
6. Providing for the family, and if your wife is earning money too, then being the head also means encouraging and supporting her work and contribution as well as making sure that money is used well.
7. Spending adequate time at home with your family. How can you be the head of a home to which you are like a visitor?
8. Modelling to your children how adults behave, how problems are solved and what it means to grow up.
9. Allowing God to reign in the home. Spiritual nurturing is not for women alone. The Lord reigns best in the homes where both husband and wife are submitted to God. Teach your children Godly ways by being Godly.
10. Protecting your home from enemies, your friends, your parents, intruders and women who try to seduce you.
11. Excelling outside the home. Guard the integrity and reputation of your name because your home and family carries your name.
12. Providing leadership through service. Leadership is not sitting on the sofa, legs raised and giving orders. It means helping out with the chores, serving your wife especially when she is exhausted or pregnant, getting your hands and clothes dirty as you play with the children, doing more than what is required of you at home. This is your family.
13. Being wise enough to walk away from a fight with your wife, choosing not to hit or slap your wife, being humble enough to say sorry when you’re wrong, letting petty domestic arguments go. Maintaining peace at home. You are the key to peace at home.
14. Making sure no one; not your wife, not any of your children feels left out or misunderstood. No child should feel like a blacksheep, unwanted, a burden or that dad is favouring one child over another; whether that child is biologically yours or not.
15. Being active in seeking solutions at home. When troubles or problems knock on the door of your home, man up, find solutions. Problems will not solve themselves.
16. Disciplining your child/children with love. Do not instil fear. Correct with love. Open the eyes of your child/children to be able to discern between right and wrong. Like the father of the Prodigal Son, let your arms of unconditional love be ever open.
16. Covering your child/children when they make mistakes and to keep them from making mistakes. Sometimes we get mad and angry at our children for the mess they make, yet we did not give them instruction and capacity to navigate through issues. We accuse our children of bringing us shame, wasting our money or failing us yet we did not cover them by shielding them from themselves. It’s like parents getting angry their teenage daughter is pregnant yet as parents they never prepared their daughter for sex and the world. We expect our children to think like us yet we left them alone to find the way; we have more years of experience. Give advise even when not asked because children often don’t know how to ask for advise or if they need advise.