How long is too long before you say I do?

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(THITU KARIBA) – Last night,  I was on radio talking about how to deal with sexual urges and this girl calls in saying that she is a great relationship and willingly gave herelf to her man sexually, and does not get why we ought to abstain until marriage, or not give into our sexual desires.

I asked her a bit about her relationship and the one thing I picked up was that she had been dating this guy for a while, which I was not at all surprised.  I mean, “Why buy the cow when you are getting the milk and steaks for free?” When we indulge in our sexual desires before marriage, you prolong marriage or keep it from ever coming up all together.

Sex is a gift from God, its wonderful, but it needs to be had in a lifetime not long-term commitment or relationship, called marriage. Really how long is too long before he asks you to marry him and why should he get all the perks without having to pay?

If you are in a non-sexual relationship, well good for you, the road to marriage just got shorter. Even still there is time that needs to be taken to know each other. I say a year is good enough, get to know each other in all seasons and times of the month and year. Get to meet his or her people, and find out what you are getting into. I would say after a year if there are no issues to be worked through and all is well, then go for it. But after months, I would say you are pushing it.  You will either find yourself falling into temptation or into a cycle of excuses.

If you are set to marry at some point, then give yourselves a time line to work with. If we want an excuse we will find it. The one excuse I find many times coming up is that, they cannot afford the wedding. In this case down size it, get married later, work and save – for that wedding that you’ve always wanted. I say this because some folks have been at it for years with the whole affordable wedding thing.

I know that  everyone is different and that we all have our own views and opinions, so I’ll ask …

How long is too long  to wait before you say I do?

 

Follow the author on Facebook Thitu Kariba ( Coach) and Twitter @Thitu_k

 

 

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  • Disgusted Male

    “…..why should he get all the perks without having to pay?..”

    This kind of statement is symptomatic of the thinking of today’s woman. So if a guy sleeps with a woman, he has to somehow ‘Pay’? What does that make the woman then??

    Isn’t sex supposed to be a physical expression of your feelings towards each other?

    Really!!

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