A new relationship can do wonders for you. It is so much fun. You and your new partner are so nice to each other and in fact for a minute there you believe you can never do wrong in each others eyes. You get this certain glow on you that comes free of charge (no need of facial products for this). You constantly ooze glee and maybe the best of all you are generally nice and kind to everyone else.
However, there are some things that people in the relationship do unknowingly while in that “new relationship status” that sabotages their relationship. In order not to do that and keep your glow and happy moods on for longer, here are some tips:
Don’t ever let your new relationship ruin your friendships
Friends are very important and everyone should have at least one of these if not a couple. While in that new relationship, you may get too pre-occupied in your new relationship such that you forget about your other friend/s and this might work against you.
I have a friend who always disappears from the face of the earth when things are working out for her and her boyfriend and then when things get rocky she comes back hoping to occupy that same spot she had left pre-rosy relationship….err…sometimes I just pretend I’m too busy.
Don’t crowd each other’s space.
While two people in a new relationship can never get enough of each other, personal SPACE is very important! Ever felt like the weekend passed you by because you never got to do the things you had planned to do as a result of being with your boo doing nothing but stare at each other and make out?
This is not very healthy! Other departments of your life shouldn’t go unmanned. If it is school work, or work that’s pending, you should take care of that too. Prioritize everything, If you need personal space to think about stuff, then allocate time for that. You’ll appreciate each other more when you realize that you are still the same people when the relationship becomes old.
Don’t let past relationship issues affect your current one.
Past things are best left in the past. Unless you are sure that what you are having is not serious, then bringing up past stuff is not necessary. Only if clarifications are needed here and there to maybe understand each other better it could be ok. In the same breath; never ever compare your current partner with your ex’s. This is the number one relationship faux pas!
Don’t introduce each other to everyone in your lives just yet, until you are certain that whatever is going on between the two of you will last. In case things don’t work out for sure, you might just find yourselves having to pretend because of what people are expecting of you.
Don’t even attempt to do what you wouldn’t want your partner not to do
Be very considerate of each other’s feelings. It’s always good to do right by your partner and not be selfish. Of course communication is always key in a relationship, so make good use of that tool from the very onset.
Pay keen attention to your partner. You should always get into a relationship with the mantra “do unto others as you would like others to do unto you”. Observing your partner and taking note of what they like or don’t like by them not necessarily having to tell you will earn your relationship extra points. Listening. Thinking. Expressing yourself… should always be the case. I mean, your partner is like your best friend.
In the relationship, Control no one but yourself.
Who likes being controlled anyway, if you really feel the urge to control somebody, let it either be yourself (of course for the better) or get a bunch of marionettes (hey, this might work as a hobby too…win-win).
There should and will only be two of you in the relationship and not three!
Sharing too much info about your relationship with your friend could be detrimental to the relationship. Even if you are in the habit of sharing too much, don’t make everyone else feel like they are in the relationship with you. Don’t kill the mystery, let people try figuring out what makes your relationship work.
Finally, you are a team so you need to work together and not against each other. #thatisall