RIP Michael Jackson

Jesus died of a broken heart goes the song and I am of the firm belief that in more ways than one, Michael Jackson too must have died a broken man. Or boy, I haven’t made up my mind which of the two he was …

While I am not making excuses for him if indeed he did touch those boys inappropriately at the Neverland Ranch, I can confidently say that the same vicious condemnation he received for ‘turning white’ must have broken his resolve and his heart.

In my opinion, Michael lived for his fans. I was watching his videos on Saturday night and you could see the utter joy beaming from his face after a live performance. He would bask in the glory of the shouts and screams and tears of his fans – who idolised him decades after the songs were released.

Even now, to possess a picture that was taken with Michael Jackson or just of him performing is enough to draw deep admiration among your peers. Whether they listen to his music everyday or not; MJ was an icon.

We all have our reasons for being touched by the Michael Enigma, and for me it was his performances. It’s like he and the performance were one and you didn’t know which one to watch. It was as if they were fused together by extreme concentration, love, talent and dedicated hard work. Just watching ‘Thriller’ took me back to my childhood days, trying not to get scared when those ‘creatures’ emerged from the graves, and at the same time trying to ape those fabulous dance moves.

I am not sure when it started going wrong, whether his father’s thrashings made him recoil into a shell that was only broken with his music, whether all the notes he could barely count forced him to purchase people’s affections, whether he had to try and stay a child despite the massive responsibility of taking care of the needs of a huge family, or whether it was all the attention he got.

After listening to the interviews of those close to him or who often interacted with him, each calling him a sweet weird guy who was very conscious about how people looked at him, my heart aches for Michael. And what people might have made him become.

So what if he wanted to look white! He was using money that he had earned to it. So what if he loved to surround himself with kids! Maybe they were the only people he could trust…

I think the judgement of Michael is what made him try hard to conform to what is ‘normal’ and hide his remarkable side. I sincerely hope that this does not happen to any other great figure in our society or world. Rest In Peace Michael…

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