Who will save us from these WhatsApp Groups bandwagon?

I am not going to mince words. I’m beginning to be repelled by these many annoying WhatsApp groups. Now, before you call me evil names which will make my ancestors sneeze in their graves, hear me out.

As the gods of technology will have it, I am a member of keddo six groups. Interestingly though, I am a member NOT by choice or design, but by compulsion. I woke up one day, and BOOM! someone had added me to Group A that brings together all family cousins. Six months later – I’m yet to figure out WHY this group exists. Well, even before I could blink, I had been added to Group B that is all about the youth outreach ministry in church. Not to be outdone, Group C emerged bearing my name as a member. It was about my colleagues at work with a loose tagline of ‘family for life’. Now besides sharing photos of three-day old babies and arguing about the employee assessment performance report, I have no idea what value this group adds to life.

Within a matter of weeks, Group D calling itself Walevi Turn Down for What was created. Honestly speaking, other than sharing photos of ‘Call Me Caitlyn’ and a confused Louis Van Gaal, I have no idea why this group exists. Then the other day Group E came out of the woodworks. It was about a friend’s wedding committee. And if I thought it couldn’t get worse, well it did. Group F appeared on the scene with a profile pic of my grandparents (May their souls rest in peace). ‘Honouring the memories of these awesome Waudo’s’ read the tagline. Trust me, I am still rolling my eyes. Then last week the newest member on the block, Group G was born. It was a Bible Study group spearheaded by a friend I used to make moves on long time ago before preachers on Tv began threatening us to plant mbegu’s through Mpesa or else we will never prosper.

Since the emergence of this groups. My phone has never stopped blinking and vibrating, with tonnes of messages received every second. It’s like the groups are competing with who is the fairest of them all. Suffice for me to say that I am now forced to charge my phone almost four times in a day. Well, do I have a choice to exit or block the groups, you probably are wondering? Absolutely yes. But then again, it’s not that simple. I have tried it before, and it sucks. This is because you can’t be allowed, thanks to the powers that be at WhatsApp, to leave the group privately and discreetly. No Sir. They will announce in coloured italics to the whole world that: Douglas Waudo has left the group. In addition to that, how on earth, I pray tell me, will you justify to God on Judgement Day that you left or blocked the WhatsApp Bible Study Group, and you didn’t leave or block the Walevi Turn Down for What Group?

Most of us, frankly speaking, are forced to be in this groups for fear of backlash from family members, colleagues or friends. You know the kind who won’t stop slapping you with evil eyes like you are a twin brother to Judas Iscariot just because you left the ‘family’ group. For what is worth though, let me go on record for saying this: I have no qualms with WhatsApp Groups. Well, at least not with a few of them.

My problem with MOST of these groups is how they are being abused, to the extent that most of them have ceased to serve the primary objective of which they were formed or created. I mean, why would a group created for purposes of planning a wedding become a one-stop shop for discussing Scandals Season 4, English Premier League, political discourses, traffic updates, celebrity gossips and a platform for sharing all kinds and forms of jokes and videos downloaded from social media, months after the wedding?

When a group completely misses the point of why it was created, it not only becomes annoying and irritating to most, but it ends up repulsing it members, forcing many to either become dormant members, befriend the MUTE feature or simply log off. Me thinks when creating these groups, it’s the responsibility of the Group’s Administrator and to an extent all members to lay down the rules of engagement, code of conduct and ethics. I mean, for the love of the holy one, why should a member share nude photos in a group created to honour the memories of my grandparents? Like seriously!

I have reached a place in my life where if a group doesn’t add any value to my life or the lives of others – sweetheart, my sincere apologies, I’m gonna hit the freeway. Call it being rude, self-centred or self-righteous, or whichever adjective, verbs or prepositions you deem appropriate, but I am not going to suck it just because I am after pleasing people. If you invite me to join a wedding planning group – for heaven’s sake, let the discussions PRIMARILY be about planning your wedding. In case you didn’t get the memo, I already have enough of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Yahoo, Gmail, Google, CNN, Discovery Channel, SuperSport 3, raunchy FM stations and porn-like Tv stations as well as Gossip Blogs to deal with when it comes to sharing jokes, crazy photos and videos, traffic updates, politics and Keeping up with the Kardashians.

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