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‘I’ll have a vibrator with that, please’

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They’re selling vibrators in supermarkets now. I was at one the other day, standing at the till to pay for normal things like bread, that people buy in supermarkets. And then an  attendant was putting them up, between the lip gloss and the condoms, right above the chocolate bars, hanging innocently off the side, smaller than your palm.

They’re pretty colours, too. All pink and shiny. I don’t know if the idea was…I don’t know what the idea was. But it was an interesting idea, nonetheless.

 

I wonder what someone buying the vibrator acts like? Do they come into the supermarket knowing what they want to buy? Do they make a beeline for the till, or do they buy milk and sausages to disguise their real aim, hide it under them when they get to the till and quickly throw it across the belt to the bar code reader and hope their neighbour -or
worse, their pastor-isn’t at the next line…or do they saunter into the supermarket, supposedly shamelessly, to buy their evening entertainment, like buying a series?

 

I am all for a sexually liberated society. The more people talk about sex, the more information there is, and thus, the smarter decisions people make concerning sexual health.

 

Which is great, because people really need to stop being stupid about sex. I am not, however, on #TeamSupermarketSexToys. There’s a time and place for adult behaviour.

 

There’s a reason raunchy shows come on after 9pm news. Can you imagine your kid/niece/nephew asking you what those are? And the way kids know when you’re lying. Get your rabbits elsewhere. There’re shops for that.

 

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