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How to handle haters and fragile egos online

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Haters-Gonna-Hate

In my line of profession, I get to meet all kinds of people. They all congregate in the comment section of my blog posts to give their 2 cents. While I know some in person, I only interact with the majority through the interwebs.

I have been privileged, through writing to meet extremely intelligent people who have added immense value to my writing. Extremely witty and analytical people who have stirred up the power of research that was lying latent within me. I have met people who challenge me, those whom I’m able to pass my article to and their views become extremely beneficial.

However just like a coin with both sides, I have met a whole bunch of people who baffle me daily. The way they react to my simple updates and blogs is so predictable. After analyzing the audience that interacts with my work, I have tried to summarize them in different categories. This article will dwell more on #TeamFragileEgos:

First of all, their beliefs are sacred. You can never write anything that challenges them or that slightly sounds contrary. Challenging these beliefs is met with ruthlessness and primitively opposed. Dare to criticize the school or university they went to, attempt to criticize the demigod leader they adore and worship, try to challenge their faith, try and pass a hint that you are about to challenge their fragile beliefs, their cave man, hunter and gatherer, rudimentary instincts will be awoken and you will face their ‘wrath.’ An erupted volcano has nothing on them.

Then there is this group that consists of adults but upon careful examination, peeps be wearing diapers. What do I mean? These are people who have realized that growing up comes with responsibilities. And the immediate expectation is for them to act like adults. Actions and inactions have huge consequences. Growing up means that you will not always cry your way out of trouble or even go back and cry to mummy.

In a bid to cling to their comfort zones like a drowning man clawing onto a sinking raft, they have stuck to childish tendencies in a bid to stick to their comfort zones. You will be able to judge this by how they reason, how they handle issues especially views, opinions and people who do not necessarily share what they believe in.

Then there is a category of blind loyalists. These people have no backbone to stand up for what they believe in. Most times, they do not even have any opinion on anything and people who do cause them nightmares like the mythical boogie man to children. They are like a flag that is tossed from one side to the other.

Their cowardice will only make them vocal when they are in a group e.g. WhatsApp group where their emotions are charged by their gods. They fear the thought of their half baked arguments being subjected to public scrutiny. But on WhatsApp or in a group where they are cheered on for lack of content, they will jump on any debate, swinging from left to right without having any stand. Whatever their ‘leader’ says goes and in them, the whole world sees yes men.

But how do you deal with these people especially for writers? 
Ignore them. There is nothing that hurts the attention-seekers fragile ego, insecure, dependent juveniles like a total blackout. Because you already know that trying to debate with them is a kin to wrestling a pig; both of you get dirty but the pig likes it. An attempt to reason with them is likely to result in a savage, irrational debate or even a violent encounter. Engaging them is like ferrying water with a sack.

Secondly, continue to do what you do best. Are you a writer? Entrepreneur? A politician, upcoming leader, journalist or even a driver? You are the only one who has the power to stop you. People will always have something to say about your craft when they have no backbone to work on their own.

Their objective is to dim your light. You will rise and soar high, as the baggage of their negativity ties them down. Their insecurities will not allow them to venture past their comfort zone. Because they find comfort in group mentality, they will not branch out and go to turbulent seas and wild uncharted paths to chase their dreams. Light as much candles as you can because none of them can dim your shine.

Finally, pray for them. Some of these people went through trauma, they are fighting a battle you know nothing about therefore pray for them. Some of them are trapped in their fears. Pray for them so that your own actions of overcoming fears and challenges to grow your vision will inspire them instead of irritating them. Take them to the Lord in prayer.

In conclusion
It’s been a roller-coaster of a journey since I penned down my first article over a year ago. I’ve messed up, written shallow pieces, I’ve survived keyboard assassins, and I’ve made friends and built a name through this humble craft. I’ve been encouraged, I’ve rubbed shoulders with the high and mighty, doors of opportunity have swung wide open.

There are moments I doubted myself and I almost gave up. The ranting of naysayers almost chocked my talent. Continue to sail the course of your destiny, the storms are a proof that you are doing something right because I’ve never seen a tree without fruits being pelted with stones. Neither have I ever seen people oppose or discuss a nobody. Do not let their negativity dull your light. Shut your ears and focus on the goal. They will call you names, they will discuss you on the assembly of their fellow fragile egos and they will find everything in their disposal, however feeble to try and attack you with.

Strengthen your wings and overcome stronger winds because after all, the ones who will inherit the earth are those who are outliers, misfits, decisive people, innovative minds, strategic people and those who don’t give a damn what other people think about them.

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Dannish Odongo
Dannish Odongo gets satisfaction in telling stories. He strives to be an all rounded writer but with main focus in Development Journalism, Lifestyle and Human Interest stories across Africa. He is an avid reader of African literature and a die hard fan of history. Recently, he discovered his wannabe motor journalism side and he hopes to build it up. He is a graduate of Commerce in Daystar University in Kenya. He is currently pursuing a masters degree in Media studies in the same University.
http://dannish.co.ke