Bad boys are reckless, exciting, and always testing the boundaries of what is normally considered as morally and socially acceptable. Being a bad boy is not all about doing 150kph on Waiyaki Way at midnight after imbibing one too many or pulling a gun on anyone who steps on your overpriced shoes. It is the realization of one’s true worth, real confidence and a brazen attitude towards life. A bad boy would therefore do anything to get whatever he ever wants without a care of other people’s opinions and feelings.
Dating a bad boy can such an arduous task to most ladies. The following are 6 guidelines to taming a bad boy.
1) Strive to be independent
Bad boys are driven by self-interest, they always think of themselves before everyone else. To successfully date a bad boy, you must also be driven by self-interest, independent and have an ego. Don’t be too available instead meet him halfway. To bad boys, dating is a conquest whose chase is a lot more thrilling than the prize. As a result they get so obsessed with the girl who seems immune to their debonair charm directing much of their energy and time to her.
Bad boys embody the freedom many women crave for hence they are often surrounded by lots of ladies who would do anything to be with them. The trick to grabbing the full attention of a bad boy is to let him think you are totally different from the previous ladies in his life.
2) Be assertive
Bad boys always wear their hearts on the sleeves and expect the same of others. It’s okay to occasionally engage him in little verbal swordplay since an assertive woman exudes high self-esteem which makes her alluring before the eyes of men. However there is a clear distinction between an assertive lady and a nagging one. Using the uncanny power bestowed on all women to get things done will have a greater success rate than repeatedly blathering like a broken record.
More often than not a bad boy will propose fun plots that involve flirting with death so as to show off his wild edge with panache. Nonetheless there are times he will want to take the backseat and let you lead, this is the perfect opportunity to showcase your funky side and make him feel like the recently canonized popes.
3) Improve your sense of fashion
Unlike men, ladies don’t need to break the bank in order to make an extreme makeover of their wardrobe. Read fashion blogs, magazines and solicit advice from your fashionable friends on how to improve your sense of fashion. There is a need for you to adopt an impeccable sense of fashion in order to ward off unwanted competition since bad boys are the living and breathing version of the forbidden fruit that most ladies want to sink their teeth into.
Every man has a ‘msupa wa giza’. This is the lady none of his friends know of, she is great in the sack unfortunately her sense of fashion (and sometimes looks) is wanting. The guy would rather be caught dead than be seen walking around and worst of all hold her hand in public. After coitus the lady is hurriedly sent off using the back door through some poorly lit alleys. Next time you are chucking from a dudes place and just before your exit the building he asks you to continue walking as he goes back to collect a phone he presumably forgot then you might as well be his ‘msupa wa giza’.
4) Intellectual and emotionally mature.
The belief that men are attracted to dim-witted ladies is by all means antediluvian. A bad boy will definitely find a lady who has more than just an overpriced weave on her head a lot more intriguing compared to a dumb one. For heavens sake you don’t need to have Marie Curie brains to know Addis Ababa is a city not a country!
Dating an emotionally insecure lady is draining. Demand to know the geographical location of a guy and raising a ruckus whenever he doesn’t pick your calls on the second ring makes you less desirable. You also need to be emotionally mature in order to tame a bad boy. How you deal with your insecurities and personal problems will greatly determine whether you will have a one night deal or a long term girlfriend.
5) Remain an enigma
Bad boys pride themselves in being spontaneous, unpredictable and a mystery. They are fascinated by the female version of themselves. When dating a bad boy you should never disclose your true intentions or feelings as he may use this to his advantage. Beat him at his own game by keeping him guessing at all times. Making it your life’s mission to taming a bad boy is a losing strategy. Let him strive to unearth the mystery around you making him feel like he chooses you not the other way round.
Playing the career woman on Friday, rambunctious lass on Saturday and a charity worker on Sunday will leave him confused, unsure of which of the 3 categories you fall under; wife material, potential girlfriend or fling. Believe you me a dude may be surrounded by a bevy of beauties but the lady he cannot fully comprehend will be the one he is always thinking of.
6) Become a go-getter
If you are beautiful, intelligent and a go-getter, only the very best of men will have courage to hit on you. Being a go-getter coupled with autonomous thinking not only elevates your worth before men but also set very high standards forcing them to treat you with great respect. When a bad boy courts such a lady he moves out his comfort zone and works twice harder in order to keep up with her. As a result he gets the feeling that the lady is the missing piece in his messed up life and treasures her like a rare gemstone.
In retrospect, bad boys are despicable men who put themselves before everyone else. You cannot tame one by enforcing a set of draconian rules. This shameless crop of men only drops their wicked ways when the change comes from within them. So ladies if you must date a bad boy ensure you are that one special lady and not the hundreds he takes for a ride.
I took a break from writing so I could concentrate on my end of semester exams, unfortunately it didn’t work out well since they teach you how to build a poultry house in a Civil Engineering class only to ask you to design a skyscraper during the exams!