Ask Kirubi: Love for a day; Love for a future

February 11, 2016

“Don’t buy her ‘flowers’ that wither. Buy her a ‘tree’ that will endure all seasons, produce flowers and bear fruits reminding her that you thought of her future.”


Every year my fellow brothers get worked up because of the pressure that comes with Valentine’s Day. The pressure to live up to the standards and expectations of the women around them and the pressure to do better than their peers is what damages their pockets. When you sit in an office filled with women, you get to hear and see a lot of things. It’s somewhat entertaining but also sad because many of us spend huge amounts of resources on material things forgetting the responsibilities we have tomorrow.

Unfortunately, many of us lack foresight but this must change. We keep saying we will work tomorrow forgetting that what we do today will affect our tomorrow.

Learn to invest in your woman and your family. A woman will have no problem supporting you and being the best she can be if she sees that you have secured her future and that of the children. Investment is not for a day but continuously over a period of time. Your woman will feel valued if you show her that you have thought of her future and used your resources to care for her livelihood. For her, that is the real Valentine’s.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that you should not celebrate Valentine’s Day. However, it is important that as you enjoy the festivities of the day, you have no doubt that your woman’s future or family’s future is secured. This will ensure that your woman not only feels special and loved on this particular day but all through her life.

Ladies, challenge your man to secure the future of his family even as he spoils you rotten. Plan your future and your wealth together. Getting carried away will only bring distress in the years to come. Remember, if he suffers you suffer too. Be his voice of reason and help him secure your future together so that the celebrations are not short lived.

Celebrations are important and they should be a reminder of what has been and what lies ahead. As you celebrate know your limit. Remember that your uniqueness is what drew you to each other so always focus on that.

Live for today knowing your tomorrow is secure. Let him love you but above all, let him love your future.

Happy Valentine’s.

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