What women want in their men

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1. “Clarity”

Women love clarity, a woman wants to know where she stands in a man’s life. Some women are bold enough to ask “What are we? Are we friends, friends with benefits, dating, courting? Do you love me, do you like me? Who am I to you?” Whereas some women keep quiet in the grey area but are frustrated inside. So much power is vested on the man, he is the one who proposes hence many times the woman is guessing where are they heading? She is scared to ask and come off as pushy resulting to repelling the man, all she needs is clarity. Though sometimes before a man gives clarity he also needs clarity.

2. “Vision”

A woman loves a man with a vision, a man with something to live for. She wants to know what future is he working towards so that his vision can merge with her vision. A woman sure of herself wants a man with goals not a man who will take her nowhere.

 

3. “Confidence”

Confidence is not being cocky. It is looking at a woman without being intimidated by her, holding her waist like he is sure of himself, entering a room with presence, speaking with resolve and power, kissing without fear, standing up and not cowing down.

 

4. “Exclusivity”

A woman loves being treated good by the man in her life, but this treatment is only special when she is the only one receiving it: his flirting, his kisses, his quality time, his intimacy, his undivided focus.

5. “Conversation leadership”

A woman loves a man who takes charge of conversations, a man who will initiate topics, who will make effort to text and call. She wants to feel his active presence.

6. “Pursuit”

A woman loves to be treated like a Queen, a treasure. She will work on making herself beautiful and attractive so that he will notice and hunt her. Even when they are an official couple or married for years, she still wants to be pursued. She measures her attractiveness by how much he thirsts after her. Even in matters sex, his pursuit makes her feel more sexy.

7. “Inquisitiveness”

A woman loves it when the man asks her questions that show interest, there is so much a woman wishes to reveal about herself if the man just shows interest. Women are like novels, novels read when the right questions are asked. Her thoughts are a library, her heart a deep well longing to be discovered. One of the greatest question a woman can be asked is “How was your day?”

8. “Contained sexuality”

Women love a sexual man but not a man who is all about sex. A sexual man will talk about something serious and come off as sexy but a pervert will constantly push the sex agenda and be a turn off. A sexual man who is in control of his sexual urges and who engages those urges with no other woman is a major turn on. This man knows he is sexy but doesn’t let it get to his head, he will look at the woman with sexual eyes or talk to her with his male voice and arouse her effortlessly.

9. “Defense”

Eventhough a woman can protect herself, she wants a man who will be her Commando, her one man army. A man who will defend her from herself when she is beating herself down, defend her from himself and the hurt he may cause and defend her from attacks of others. She wants a man who will not shy from speaking out when her name is tarnished, a man who will roar when other men try to come between them.

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10. “Sensitivity”

A woman loves a man intouch with his feelings, one who will say it when he is in love with her, one who will tell her when he is not OK, one who will let her hold him when he breaks down, one who will say it when he is lost, angry, tired or happy. Men have emotions too. Be considerate of her feelings.

11. “Creativity”

Creativity shows a man is going out of his way to please the woman. She will love it when their dates look well thought out and planned, when he overwhelms her with his brilliance and decorates her life in original ways that make her moments spent with him memorable.

12. “Suspense”

In as much as women love clarity, they love when the man has an element of surprise, when he constantly seems one step ahead, crafting something to make her smile. Spontaneity thrills a relationship/ marriage. Man, don’t be predictable, women love mystery but don’t prolong it; keep her on the edge but not too long on the edge that she falls into boredom.

13. “Passion”

Romance makes the blood boil, a woman needs a kick in her heart. Women love to be desired, undressing eyes that look with want and hands that touch the right way and places. The words spoken to her should have warmth and the advances made to her should have fire.black-couple-in-bed1

14. “Attentiveness”

A woman loves talking, but as she talks she wants the man to listen and remember what she says, for him to look at her not the TV, newspaper or phone. The moment she notices his listening is only symbolic not actual, that he really doesn’t care, she will become economical with her words believing she is a bother. No man serious about his lady will want to make her feel like a bother. Listen.

15. “Consistency”

So you are good to her, but your good should not be seasonal. Too many women get excited by the man only for him to disappear or grow cold then suddenly come up hot and exciting again when it’s convenient or when he wants something from her. Inconsistency is confusing, consistency shows what you have for her is genuine and not a game.

16. “Honesty”

A woman values honesty no matter how painful. Tell her if you are not ready to take the relationship to the next level, if you don’t have money, if you are stuck, if you have done a mistake, if you had a child with another before her; be honest and she will find a way. She can handle the truth, secrets in the name of protecting her just shows you don’t trust her or you don’t find her mature enough.

17. “Manly authority”

A woman loves when the man gives an opinion. Eventhough it’s her decision to make, she will share her situation to get his backing, blessing or input. She loves it when the man speaks to her life. She loves it when she is weak or sees herself as defeated and he inspires life back into her like a coach who sees her potential. But this manly authority shouldn’t be misused. Never should he dictate, abuse or dominate her but always he must build her with his words.

18. “A dose of ego”

Ego in the right measure is a good thing. A man must have some pride, things that are beneath him which he cannot do. He shouldn’t whine or be a cry baby. He should compliment her but not worship her or constantly glorify her as if her loving him is doing him a favor, as if she is a Queen loving a poor peasant. Some men worship women with boyish and over dramatized compliments which only make the woman feel uncomfortable. Act like a man who knows how great he is, a King who deserves his Queen. This “She’s out of my league/ I feel unworthy” is for immature boys.

19. “Reliability”

A woman loves a man who says what he means and means what he says, a man who if he gives her his word she can take it to the bank, a man she can depend on and who does what he says he will do.

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Dayan Masinde

Dayan Masinde is a Nairobi based Kenyan artist specializing in Poetry, Fine Art, Portrait Art, Murals, Creative Writing, Music, Illustrations and Animation. He is often described as "The Artist Inspired by Love" because of his use of artistic expressions to inspire, celebrate and help understand the mystery of love. His poetry book "WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE" is available for purchase worldwide on amazon.

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