#ScoreCard: How Much do You Appreciate Your Spouse?

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couple with children

A lot of married people feel unappreciated in their marriage. Marriage to many has become this thing to tolerate, not to enjoy. Truth is, your spouse will play his/her role even with no appreciation from you but will do even more and enjoy it when you are more appreciative.

Rate yourself. Go through this test on your own then with your spouse and see how appreciative you are.

1. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you when your spouse serves you a meal or a drink? When your spouse cooks for you? Do you say thank you? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

2. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you after love making? After you have got your orgasm do you show appreciation to your spouse by kissing him/her, saying “I love you”, telling your spouse how great the love making was? OR do you go straight to sleep, your spouse has given you the climax you wanted? One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

3. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you when your spouse corrects you? Do you thank your spouse for making you a better person OR does your pride make you want to quickly gloss over the correction? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

4. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you of your spouse on special days? On mothers day/father’s day, your wedding Anniversary, your spouse’s birthday; do you take time to make your spouse feel valued and special in an extra way OR do you see no reason to pause a moment in this busy life and focus on marking landmarks in your love life? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

5. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you when your spouse gives you a gift? Do you thank your spouse for the gesture of love OR do you complain it’s not your kind of gift, belittling the gift because you’re used to your spouse giving you gifts? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

6. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you of your spouse in public? When with people, do you introduce your spouse like he/she is very important and a big deal, bragging about your spouse OR do you avoid your spouse, keeping off your spouse, talking down to your spouse as if you are ashamed of him/her? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

7. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you when your spouse goes out of his/!her way to please you? When your spouse dresses right, takes you out on a date, plans something special for you two; do you acknowledge the effort and give a compliment OR do you act like you don’t care or even notice? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

8. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you when your spouse comes to your aid? When you are in need of money, sick, stuck and your spouse assists you; do you give thanks OR do you struggle in admitting your weakness? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

9. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you when your spouse talks with you over the phone or chats with you? When you are having a conversation with your spouse, do you conclude the conversation with warm words such as “Thank you for calling”, “I love you”, “Talk to you later” OR do you rudely and abruptly disconnect? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

10. On a scale of 1 to 10, how appreciative are you of your spouse before your child/children? Do you deliberately project the good side of your spouse to your child/children OR do you disrespect your spouse as your child/children watch? Rate yourself. One being not appreciative, ten being very appreciative.

Work on your appreciation. It’s in the words spoken, attention given, facial expression and tone.

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Dayan Masinde

Dayan Masinde is a Nairobi based Kenyan artist specializing in Poetry, Fine Art, Portrait Art, Murals, Creative Writing, Music, Illustrations and Animation. He is often described as "The Artist Inspired by Love" because of his use of artistic expressions to inspire, celebrate and help understand the mystery of love. His poetry book "WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE" is available for purchase worldwide on amazon.

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