A tongue-in-cheek look at how to fool your house guests

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(By Lyndy Mansfield) Here are some silly, but fun ways to impress your stay over visitors when you are not very domesticated, but still need to make them think you are!

Jars. These are a fancy way of suggesting you are an efficient and capable provider. Decant all your bits of pasta, rice, and any other colourful grains, into homey looking ball jars and keep them clearly visible on shelves in your kitchen.

Water. Invest in several large bottles of bought water – still and sparkling – and keep them in the fridge, so your visitors think this is the norm. No need to tell them you usually drink from the tap!

Bathroom. A scruffy bathroom is a dead give away. Clean it within an inch of its life, squirt bleach in the loo and shine up all the taps. A fresh flower or two will impress!

While still in the bathroom, hide your scruffy toothbrushes and pull out those long forgotten perfumed soaps and bath salts, etc., that have been sitting in the cupboard since Christmas.

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Herbs. On a windowsill in the kitchen, a water bottle filled with a variety of herbs is the right way to go. Everyone will think you probably grew them yourself… meanwhile, who’s gonna tell them you got them from your local grocer!

Books. Put a highbrow hardcover book with a bookmark to show you are half way through, on your bedside table! I love this one! Try War and Peace or any other Tolstoy!

Tea. Have several varieties, from Green to Hibiscus and Caramel falvours and nonchalantly give them a choice. Of course you will still have Five Roses and Ketepa!

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