Ladies, lay off that vibrator!

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As a flight attendant, I’m used to dealing with the demanding schedule of flying to and from Nairobi, and fulfilling the ever-growing shopping list from my girlfriends. Ranging from sky-high stilettos to MAC Cosmetics, the shopping list is always as diverse as my friends. But, the most popular request is still for a vibrator.

I usually am pretty good at buying everything on the list, but as for the vibrators, I have started refusing requests for the sake of promoting better sex lives for my girlfriends.

Vibrators were invented in the early 1880s as a medical aid to soothe women diagnosed as hysterical, and in recent times, has become a woman’s inexpensive pocket-sized replacement to incompetent men.

Manufactured in a variety of glistening colours and in various sizes, with most vibrators offering ridiculous vibration and rotation speeds – you’re guaranteed that you’ll have an orgasm in three seconds and then be able to do it again three seconds later…what girl wouldn’t want one?

However, in a 2011 study, researchers found that a woman’s sexual experience and expectations changed after using a vibrator.

It’s not rocket science really, basically no normal man will be able to do the work as consistently, lengthy and as efficiently as a vibrator. Not even a porn star would be able to match its electric competitor. Too much vibrator use ultimately produces unrealistic expectations for your partner’s performance.

So many sexually-frustrated woman have turned to vibrators and have ultimately become dependent. Studies show that if a woman is vibrator-dependent, it reduces the risk of her ability to have an orgasm with a man.

Vibrators are the downfall of women.

Yes, vibrators can outlast any man, but remember that no matter what kind of “Super Rabbit Vibrator” you have, no electric-powered machine can replace the one-on-one intimacy you have when you’re with someone else.



SOURCE
Journal Reference:
1. Bat Sheva Marcus. Changes in a Woman’s Sexual Experience and Expectations Following the Introduction of Electric Vibrator Assistance. The Journal of Sexual Medicine, December 2011

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  • Wangari

    I think vibrators are the downfall of men…not the other way round.

  • Stephen Kahuthu

    hahhaah so true…ebu waambie

  • Mambotimothy72

    with the Nyerian ‘femme’ on the rampage and the increasing vibrator dependance, and oh..sperm donors, the male species is QUICKLY phasing out#IllicitThoughts

    http://www.blackmambopoet.com

  • Innocent

    Do they pay import duty on these devices…or is deviouses?

  • Muhana

    Like all the deviations man has developed form the traditional and natural way of life, this vibrator trend will add to the many problems and failures modern society has. 

  • Miss Vee

    Why can’t I just keep both the man and the vibrator? The man is great for the intimacy , but the vibrator is good for  finishing what the man started but can’t finish. I love guys  but that O feeling is out of this world

  • Elijahnyangwara

    An orgasm every three seconds……if thats what God wanted he could have created it!….Its remains a fake and thats the bottom line!

  • anapolojetik

    Whatever!!! I guess we should stop assuming that every woman out there wants to have a sexual relationship with men!! No, a vibrator works best for self-loving people who just wants to masturbate and also women loving women 🙂 A VIBRATOR IS THE BEST INVENTION SINCE SLICED BREAD!!! Vibrators will be here for a loooooooonnnngggg time…In fact, a very very long time! Talk of orgasm donors 🙂

  • Are there vibrators for men ?

    • Ndugu Mwema

      The discussion is pastime, but yes there are, and they’re called flesh lights! 

  • Thomas Ndemo

    Do we have male Vibrators/robots  in the market??I think men will not feel left out if they got theirs on the shelves and then ….God knows we shall have a country of serious vibrators!!

  • a real lady will alwayz want the man more

  • Joseph

    Arrgh! Shame on you vibrator-using ladies! I wouldn’t touch you with a 10-foot pole, let alone the half-foot one!

    • cathhhy

       thats up to u .suite ua self boy

  • hehehehe!!!!!!!! this is funny if not astonishing.

    And they blame this on men

  • Those that get fulfillment out of vibrators get them; at least they will leave us men with ladies bereft of unrealistic expectations.

  • seksi

    ahhhh……any day men are just a cover so that am not left out in the crowd by my peers but heck sex with them is a no no….not all the way their selfish buggers…women are self less i’ll love a woamn anyday and carry my lippyvibe everyday but that man is purely for socio-interactions strictly….p.s he knows that.

  • Denno

    vibrators are to a woman what porn is to a man

  • Myhoneywell

    If the vibrator can satisfy a woman sex desire,, meanwhile  men can be satisfied with the sex balloon that he can use anytime and inflate  it anytime.

  • Yuyubenson

    What kind of women who hate men would want this gadget that mimics the male genetalia in shape and function? I wish to know what do the women imagine as they use this gadget -obviously having sex with a man! or Mr So and So. So men are still central in the lives of these pretenders!

  • ok ladies..follow the advice.

  • Afugufugu

    i bring a vibrator to my sex sessions just in case i get a freaky chick but am proud to say i have never had to use it,i get on pretty well…i think,coz some of these chicks can get real Angelina Jolie in the bedroom.

  • scanfish

    Vibrators don’t talk endearments,  don’t appreciate a woman, and can’t pull your heartstrings. They are impersonal and mechanical, like a toothbrush…or a toothpick. 

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