(THITU KARIBA) My friend and I were talking last night, and we wondered how it is that a couple can be so in love one minute and then the next they seem to be so angry and bitter with each other especially if they had a child. Many times, I used to be told that women get pregnant at times to trap men. In our culture, if you were to get a girl pregnant you were required to marry her. This however is not the case today, when I got pregnant, I did not want to marry the man I got pregnant with, nor did he want to marry me. Moreover, the pregnancy seemed to be the death of our relationship and the beginning of anger, hate and bitterness.

We often hear of men complaining they got baby mama drama, we often here that single mothers are bitter and angry women, but what we often do not here is that they were made that way. In the beginning the man is so in love with her, he treats her like a queen, he proceeds to have sex with her and in most cases they promise that they will always be together. The couple go ahead to have sex without having taken into consideration the responsibility that comes with what happens in that bed. I mentioned once that sex is Gods gluing mechanism, it makes the two one and it is also his technique of having us multiply and fill the earth. In a relationship where sex is involved, one of the two or both of the purposes of sex will occur. They two become attached and or also get pregnant.

I can’t speak for everyone else, but once I said I was pregnant, it became like a game of 20 questions. It was all about whether I was on the pill, when I last took it, all about my cycle and why or how I did not prevent it from happening. Immediately, I could see that the man was trying to detach themselves from the consequence and responsibility that comes with, after that nothing worked. Sex is God’s plan and it has a purpose, at this point, I am reminded of the word that says, a man may have many plans in his heart but, never the less, Gods plan shall prevail. The couple in most cases just plans to be in a relationship, and the sex is just another thing they do but they do not plan to become one or get pregnant, after all they are not married.

Sex will live out its purpose whether you are married or not. Sex was designed by God for marriage, and it will not change it. God given dictates for you not to have fun with it outside its jurisdiction. Sex is designed to make the two of you one and to give you children. Sex is designed for the marriage bed, where the two have vowed till death do us part and can then become one, where the two have plans for a family and will rejoice at the news of being pregnant.
The bible says we are not to awaken love before its time. God is not trying to be selfish; He is trying to protect us from the consequences of the bed without the marriage. It really is like driving without a license and like the good Father he is, he says wait till the time is right to take him or her to bed because there are responsibilities that come with it. Anger, bitterness, pain, hatred, depression, abortion and even death could cometh about if you do it at the wrong time.

If you are not married, it is not time for bed. Do not awaken love before its time; trust in Him when he says in his time he will make all things beautiful.

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